A Super Soaker™…for Champagne.

[The following is a new category of posts on Flawesome that we like to call “You Can Actually Buy This”, highlighting questionable products that aren’t concepts, but real products that you can purchase.]

Why. Why why why why why why. Why do we live in a world where this exists??

That, my friends, is a gun that uses a bottle of Champagne as “ammo.” It’s called the Champagne Gun, and it can be yours for only $459. Why do you want a gun that shoots Champagne? Well, if you’re a reasonable human being, you probably don’t. BUT if you are a member of that elite group known as “People who have too much money, and are assholes”, then there are probably many reasons why you would want the Champagne Gun. Here is a video showing some product use scenarios.

As you can see, this gun is perfect for those times you want to playfully spray your loved ones with Champagne while you’re on your yacht. Did you ever want to randomly spray Champagne on a crowd in a nightclub or bar? The Champagne Gun is for you. Or maybe you’re just hanging out by yourself, by the pool. What better way to chillax than to point the barrel of the Champagne Gun in your mouth, and guzzle down some bubbly? Drinking Champagne from a glass just doesn’t give you the same experience, you know? This guy knows what I’m talking about.

Is he sitting on a swing…that’s hanging from pipes? Do you think this is some room in his mansion? It looks like it could be some sort of sauna. Anyway, yeah. The Champagne Gun. It’s $459, and available in three colors: Gold, Chrome, and everyone’s favorite iPhone/Apple Watch color, Rose Gold.

Please don’t buy it. Please.